he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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