dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize