We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i just google imaged poop.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
