What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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