But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize