God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
