You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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