whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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