If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
