Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
