Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
