well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Randomize
