I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
