So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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