I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
