My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
