He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
