Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
