well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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