brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
