I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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