I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
