Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
