Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
