Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Randomize
