sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Randomize
