She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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