Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
He felt like a one man threesome
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
