Already got asked if we're dating
wanna go halves on a baby?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
