theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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