thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
