He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
This couple is walking their pig around campus
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
