Are we in a gay sports bar?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
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