I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
