Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
