So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
