then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
In America we eat man semen.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize