spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
