She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Randomize