something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
