I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Acid is not a monday night drug
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
