ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
