After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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