Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
