Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
