Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
