if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
