He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
