Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
