The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
