they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
